I found out that I wasn’t missing any special nugget of information and that I was actually socially competent, I just wasn’t in the right group *all along*. I hate being friendless. While everybody loves beauty in another, studies show that people are attracted to the kind of looks that they were exposed to in their formative years. I enjoy my life, and am no longer hurt by the fact that, I have no friends, can’t keep a girlfriend longer than a year, and my parents don’t like me. It hurts my feelings when I find out about my family going on vacations or friends getting together but I was never included. Vocalize or write down a reply to your critical inner voice. Sick peoples try’s to make us feel crazy. I am not saying we are more important, just a special and unique different just as needed as quartz, but not quartz. No one should have to fight all the time. What a horrible circle! Many times, this person would tell me about a spouse that had been very unkind to them (the spouse had passed years earlier from cancer). Maybe, “I’m lonely” is just something some people say. I knew I wasn’t alone and self esteem and self worth fluctuates a lot, especially since the world we live in is so uncertain. I try to meet new people but I can’t get past the aquantaince stage. It’s the same for me. One thing I do know.. I too noticed that some people who no one likes because of bad behavior are included. Ive felt crippled by my past and that horrible internal voice that always puts me down and tells me Im useless and unlovable, finding a way to lessen it and gain some confidence would be my goal now. They will get worse. So, while we may feel alone in thinking “nobody likes me,” we actually have that in common with a staggering number of people in the world. My first school was for the disabled, was miles away from where I lived so I boarded there and I didn’t feel I belonged there because my disabilities were less than others around me; The second school was a conventional one, where I was continually wondering, ‘Do I own up to other people or will I just get mocked and worse?’ – I had seen the impact that verbal abuse had had on other kids at my previous school – ‘Are people saying things about me behind my back?’ If I ask, will that mean I have to own up to what they don’t actually know about (the one I am ashamed of) and then have to live with the consequences of telling them? Kinda like the cleaning lady telling the MD that his or her company is a failure. I believe if you are intelligent it makes people feel inferior and uncomfortable. I have also tried therapy but I really didn’t get much out if it. People don’t like me but I have stopped trying to figure out how, or try and find my value in pleasing them (yes i’m a people pleaser). No timing is too late for love. He is gaslighting you. Yes this exactly, you put yourself out there and are terrific, just to realize that you still don’t meet par, they’re just being polite and really want nothing to do with you, and you can feel it, you can tell they aren’t really interested, shifting uncomfortably waiting for the moment they can get away. It’s also possible that since you seem to be a “hard worker” maybe be you are playing it too hard to meet without YOU realizing it, which can be a turn off to most. The researches of loneliness found that us lonely people, tend to act in way that “put off” others because of our own negative thoughts and biases. Hi there idk if you will read it in this endless comment section but if u do, I have a very similar experience too except it was my dad. 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